Gingersnaps

I came across this brilliant piece of blogging and reproduce it here in full and supply this link if anyone wants to visit the site and read the comments or see whatever else might interest you from gingersnaps.


On Death Row

With my new job came an entirely new field of work in this journey called my career. I found much satisfaction in being able to minister to patients, families, visitors, and co-workers in my time at Baptist Hospital. Now, I am completely amazed at the opportunity that has been given me to learn more than about a field that I had never dreamed I would be a part of. I am working for an advocacy organization whose goal is to raise public awareness of the flaws in our criminal justice system, namely, in the administration of capital punishment in this state.

I have been reading up on this subject, and am mystified at the poor representation and process of evidence gathering and witness testimony when another life hangs in the balance. This isn’t about the crime the defendant did or did not commit, but the careless manner in which our system chooses who gets the death penalty and who doesn’t and why the death penalty is an option at all.

Disclaimer: I do not pretend to know even the most basic tenants of this subject, as I am only a week into this job and have only begun to research the mission of this organization. I have a lot to learn.

And finally, the entire reason for this post…

Yesterday, I was given the opportunity to go with one of my bosses to visit Abu-Ali Abdur’Rahman at the Riverbend Maximum Security Correctional Facility here in Nashville. This is probably hard for some of you to believe, but I had never been to a jail before in my life, much less the state’s maximum security facility where Tennessee’s most notorious criminals reside.

I have to admit that I was a bit excited about going. I wasn’t really nervous, but my anticipation built as we were driving there, because I knew that I was getting to do something that not many get to…and that’s talk one on one with a man who came within hours of dying by lethal injection. A man who experienced the Death Watch.

I’m not sure what I was expecting, but the front area of the place reminded me of where you get your drivers license. Very, um, “state facility built in the 70s” looking. We got signed in, screened, and on our way to the next set of checkpoints. The only thing I was allowed to take was my ID. Not even some cards that we wanted to take to Abu-Ali. Anyway, we went through our second screening area, and then walked outside through the frigid cold to his “pod”. I think I also imagined that I would be walking past a bunch of cells with men beating on the bars and heckling me (like in the movies), but the only time I saw any other inmates was through a wooden fence where they were having their outside time. It sounded like two guys were having an argument–a lot of yelling. I just kept walking–fast–to get over to Abu-Ali’s pod.

The lobby area was very small, with a guard and a sign-in book. I was overwhelmed at the smell of the building. It reminded me of the way that the rest stops along the Florida Turnpike smelled when I was a kid. I don’t know if that is an antiseptic or what, but it wasn’t very pleasant, and took awhile for me to get acclimated to. The guard radioed back to another guard to bring in Abu-Ali, and we sat in a very small room with 3 chairs, and bars on the windows. On the door going back into the area where the inmates live, there was a hole where they had to reach their hands through to get their handcuffs taken off.

So in comes Abu-Ali with no big presentation of the guard taking off cuffs and shackles…just a guy in a white and blue jumpsuit carrying a very large file folder of papers. My boss introduced me to him, and he gently shook my hand. I was taken aback at how soft-spoken and gentle this guy who was supposed to be a hardened criminal was.

The conversation that ensued was fascinating. He talked to me about a little of his life story. Here is an excerpt from the organization’s website:



“Abu-Ali suffered extreme physical, sexual and emotional abuse at the hands of his parents. As a child, Abdur’Rahman and his two siblings were abandoned by their mother. She put the three children in a taxi, drove them to the woods, and left them. The taxi driver later collected the children and turned them over to the state. Abdur’Rahman was repeatedly beaten with a leather strap by his father, who also struck his penis with a baseball bat. He was made to remove his clothes, placed hog-tied in a locked closet, and tethered to a hook with a piece of leather tied around the head of his penis. At an early age, Abdur’Rahman was described by mental health professionals as “highly disturbed,” “very sick,” and in need of commitment. He has been diagnosed as having Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, and Disassociative Disorder. Abdur’Rahman’s brother committed suicide in 1996, and his sister attempted suicide on numerous occasions and was institutionalized repeatedly for mental illness. Her whereabouts are currently unknown.”

Because of his disdain and disgust at anybody who would endanger a child, Abu-Ali had become a sort-of vigilante, attempting to act as a civil “police” in his neighborhood. He and his partners had entered the home of his victim with the intent to scare him away from selling drugs to the kids in that neighborhood, when it all went terribly wrong.

At this point in the conversation, Abu-Ali said something that I think will stick with me my entire life. In talking about what it is like on the streets and in the ghetto neighborhoods he has lived in, he said that with all of the focus our country has put on fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan and Iraq, he has witnessed and fought the “Taliban” in his own war zone-like neighborhoods. The evil of this world does not only reside in the Middle East. It is in our own backyards….so why are we putting all of our time and money there and not here where our own are suffering and dying everyday?

Abu-Ali has become a mentor to the younger inmates. He has gotten his Paralegal degree through a mail correspondence course, and has been appointed the counsel between inmates who have gotten themselves into trouble and the guards. He is a very, very spiritual man who talked about how he converted to Islam, but has chosen to study all beliefs so as to have a more universalistic understanding of God. He condemned what the Jihadists are doing, and quoted scripture from the Koran to back his condemnation up. There was so much he talked about that I wish I could have had a tape recorder. I was completely enamoured with this whole conversation, sitting on the edge of my seat the entire time.

Abu-Ali is a poet and an artist. He shared some of his poetry and articles with me. There is actually a newsletter that the inmates write and publish each week, and he gave me one of those to take with me. Some of his art was amazing. With all of the time they have on their hands, I’m sure that the development of any talent is born out of necessity to relieve the boredom. It was pretty cool to see some of his work.

Finally, at the end of our visit he asked if my boss had those cards…the cards weren’t for him, they were for him to send out to people. He said that in his years there, he hadn’t missed one birthday of the 45 or so people he sends one to. He asked that we really try to get those to him so he wouldn’t miss anyone’s birthday. I thought that to be quite interesting. I am good at discerning a snow job…it may take a little time, but I usually can spot a con artist. At the same time, I always try to see the good in people, no matter what the circumstances. This guy seems to have a truly good heart. He seems like somebody who is a perfect candidate for psychological and social rehabilitation.

So why on earth is this guy on Death Row?

I’m not a Death Penalty abolitionist. In fact, I had never given it much of a thought until the opportunity to work in this field was presented to me. After hearing this guy’s background, case history, and overall story, I have come to question what our system is doing exactly. It seems as if as an entire society, the punishment is not fitting the crime. That goes from Elementary School up. From not enough punishment to it being over the top out of proportion.

As we left the prison, I had to just be silent and process the experience. It has taken me until this morning to put it into some very uneloquent words, but it is what it is.

My visit to Death Row has provoked a spiritual awakening inside of me for something that I never had even given much thought to. Jesus visited the prisoners. He was a friend to the indigent. Don’t get me wrong, He taught justice. However, more so He focused on the spirit of the person, and didn’t hold their past against them.

That is the kind of compassion I want.

~ by Ginger on February 17, 2007.


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