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Friday, March 09, 2007

Exclusive - extracts from Alastair Campbell's diaries "The dodgy Blair years"

Day One: I wake up to the sound of a bell ringing in my ears, at first I think that it is the alarm clock, but the Tone is different, and then I assume that it is Rory Bremner doing a very bad impression. As I wake up a bit more, I realise that it is the telephone that is ringing. I answer it, you could have bowled me over with a cricket ball. It was none other than Tony Blair, the New Labour Prime Minister. He wanted to know if I was interested in working for him as a Public Relations adviser. I must admit I hummed and arrhed for a bit, but when he said that he was a pretty straight kind of guy, I took him at face value wouldn't you? And, agreed. Just then, this bird I had picked up last night, Cherie Booth, a Scouser, wide-eyed and wide-mouthed, woke up and asked who it was on the phone. I told her, you are not going to believe this, it was Tony Blair, the New Labour Prime Minister. She said, Oh fuck, how did my husband find out so quick? I asked her, I thought you said your name is Cherie Booth. She replied that it is, but that she is also Mrs Tony Blair. Oh fuck, I thought, the first day on the job and I am screwing the bosses missus. But, it occurred before I had got the job, so my conscience is clear. Cherie was putting on her robes and saying that she would be late for court. And, there I was thinking that she had been to a fancy dress party when she picked me up last night. Outside the limousine awaited with its four police out riders to whisk me off to Downing Street. I was so excited that my head was in a spin...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

With such astounding wit and fantastic repartee I could offer you a job on a scummy blog like mine.....